In yester generations, there had been a lot of differences in opinion about how to handle children especially those in students. But now with the wide exposure and innumerable wealth of knowledge, this has become a key issue of all parents to handle their teenagers. With both parents working, with grandparents away, with no company of cousins, aunts or uncles, today’s children have got none to pour their heart out. After a particular stage, no child wants to be advised or preached about any human values. But a child with his/her parent or grandparent as a role model never gets this problem. Often ignorance of right relationships result in wrong relationships, spoiling the whole show.
A child can be analysed from various aspects and backgrounds family, culture , academic,physical,mental,moral etc.. , a few of which comes by nature, the rest through nurture. Right from childhood a child should be trained to follow the cultural values , moral responsibilities and social duties. Nothing becomes a habit in one day. Then comes the physical and psychological part which is often highly influenced by the cultural, moral and social way in which the child gets used to. Academics and co-scholastic activities matter a lot but they come only next to the earlier aspects.
Today’s children have to deal with different issues like peer pressure,ragging,academic expectations and alien like parents – sorry to use the word , but today , influence of western culture has made us loose the values of joint family, where every child was a pet to one member or other of the family, with whom the child was free to discuss anything and everything and who, the child believed, could find a solution to all his pressures and problems. Today the number of educated and sophisticated parents has increased , but the percentage of parents who spent quality time has decreased considerably . Never to blame the parents , thanks to our economic developments.
Why leave the children search for their role models outside the family ? why to teach children to respect other’s feelings ? why to blame a convict after the crime has been committed ? why to preach social responsibility to the children ? Innumerable whys….with only one answer. Try to be good instead of pretending to be good. Be transparent in all activities never preach,always practice .Remember children don’t want ring masters , they want real masters who can appreciate their deeds ,who distinguish their strengths and weakness ,who guide them in turmoil and who console them in failures . Remember failures teach a lot a things to us , like analyzing where we went wrong ,what should not be done, what are the possibilities of winning etc.. which can help them in their long life.
Encourage the child,say if there is a problem,there are atleast two solutions. Never over react to situations which makes the child too insecure or too sensitive . Encourage independent thinking never force ideas on your child . Remember “the child came through you, not from you “. He has his own likes and opinions. Many elders don’t even let their children discuss love,sex or other such things,which the teenagers are curious about. But if parents can give the right guidance, explaining about the transition from childhood to youth the differentiation from infatuation and love , the complication in getting physically and emotionally involved etc.. , the child gets the right perspective regarding such things. Not only that, he feels free to discuss anything with the parent , he confides everything to the parent, he grows up as a confident youth and a citizen who can contribute well to his family society and country.
Coming to the academic side,children should feel free to approach teachers and teachers should be student friendly.in many instances , teachers have proven to have encouraged even the below average students in becoming achievers.there should be a healthy relationship between the two to have unadulterated love and affection , which can enhance them in achieving throughout ther career.the students should feel free to discuss the toughest situations with them and such a coordination and cooperation can do miracles.
Many parents feel that they should provide with all the comforts, which were deprived to them to their children . it’s quite natural but we shouldn’t forget the fact that the children should be aware of our limitations and difficulties . out of affection many parents fail to forsee the fact that,they are unknowingly spoiling their own children . parents are not money making machines whom children can always demand for whatever they want . this issue should be taken care of in a very matured but transparent way . children should be made a part of financial discussions of the family so that they should also feel responsible towards family situation .
In today’s age,children have become more self centered , more because of the fact that being the only child of the family they are so much unduly pampered and spoilt,that they don’t even want to share the minimal duties towards the elders and family . since all these problems hail from lack of understanding between youngsters and the elders . so this is essential that a transparent relationship should be maintained among the two . this transparency is possible only if freedom of expression is maintained .
“Let’s sing the song of friendship,
Let’s light the lamp of love,
Let’s pray to god for tolerance,
Let’s teach the theme of peace.”