Dowry-Must for Indian Marriages!!
DOWRY-
Running down the memory lane,14 yrs before ,in a class room,Tamil period,my tamil sir started a discussion as mentioned,Dowry System in India Who is largely responsible!!Men or Women,suddenly noise erupted /clash started between boys and girls,girls supporting girls and raising voice against boys and vice-versa!!various points were put forward!!all of a sudden a girl{who name signifies silence}makes a point that dowry problem is due to women greediness, in the search of rich bridegroom they end up paying huge dowry!!almost all girls were against these statements,some even started to avoid her stating anti-feminist attitude!! Let us come to the actual point ,keeping aside that feminists and anti- feminists progress .
Dowry-What is that?Is it required?Yes it is required!!!,eyes wide open!!!,let us even widen our thoughts,to know dowry we need to know what is marriage!!2 ppl getting in to a relationship ,tie the knot !! yes..but how does dowry plays a part in it.Suddenly when 2 ppl start living together,they may not know what are the day to day essentials,so dowry is nothing but Senior couple providing esssentilas to new couple to start their relationship without much hassle!!Dowry very much fits in Marriage systems.
Then how does it breaks marriages/end relation ship.India is a unique nation,with diversity in all aspects ,it is home for both riches and poor,greedy and ppl with content!!Dowry which should be considered as gift given by parents to newly wed couples,this gift can come from both bride and bridegroom parents,apparently this doesn’t not happen,Dowry should not be demanded rather discussed with newly wedcouples for their inputs and suggestions.
Dowry varies from state to state,region to region,district ot district,Suppose a normal Reddy wedding costs 10to 15 cr,where as rich iyer marriage costs 1 cr.and girl in kanyalumari needs to come100to 125 sovereign of Gold,where as from salem u just need 30 to 40 sovereigns, everything has a politics behind it,Kanyakumari{Kk} girlsgold dust is due to competition from Kerala where as Reddy.s to showcase the brides luxury!!
Nor all Kk girl can afford that gold or all reddys girl can afford that much luxury!!This create divide in the society ,
Dowry is neither a symbol of luxury/nor related to any regional politics!!it even creates problem post marriages,bridegroom parents demanding more or bride in order to part away with inlaws fake dowry cases are lodged,
Parents think that dowry should be given only for arrangedmarriages,I strongly condemn and regret that ,even it should be given for Love marriages/intercaste marriages,dowry need not be status symbol,its just a gift given to newly weds as rememeberance or starting of their hassle free relationship!!
So Dowry as a system is gud, instead of demanding ,cordial discussion between parents and wedding coupleis gud ,also public display of dowry of rich marriages should also be avoided,this can create unwarranted greed among others,
Lets come to conclusion,Anything which is overdone is hazardous!!let we understand that money is not all we needed for being happy,peace of mind though we need,,Greed less Happy more,Dowry as needed!!!
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